Struggle

Does this look fun???

Yesterday, I was looking at the Facebook page of my friend Michelle Goss and found this fabulous quote by Victoria Castle:

“If struggling were the way to get there, we‘d all be there by now”.

Well, I know I certainly would!  I grew up with a deeply ingrained work ethic and it‘s taken me a while to understand that “harder” is not “better” or even really productive.

It‘s very freeing to move through life with the understanding that my value and self respect exist quite separately from the volume and scope of my accomplishments.

From this understanding, I can allow the action of my life to flow from a deep sense of presence and connection to purpose.  In my experience it is here that the resonance of Fulfillment resides.

We are all longing to contribute ourselves , our love, our joy to the world around us.  In my experience, this flows naturally from me when I am connected to mySelf and to Spirit.

Truthfully, I LOVE to work hard.  I find it rich, energizing and fulfilling as long as I am connected to myself and the larger river of Life that runs through me.

Recently, I read something about firing oneself as “manager of the universe.”  What a terrific idea!  Everything is unfolding exactly as it should and I certainly don‘t need to be in a fight with the way things are unfolding.

Isn‘t that what struggle is really?  Fighting to change or overcome what IS rather than savoring and embracing it.  The most challenging times of my life have almost always been the richest and the more I bring my presence to what is unfolding in front of me right NOW, the more I am able to engage and contribute in a way that is nourishing and filled with joy.

Where do you struggle?  What would happen if you let go?

Conviction of the Heart

The Kimsey Sisters Do PF Changs!

Last Sunday, I participated in the PF Changs Half Marathon in Phoenix, Arizona.  It was swell (a massive understatement) and I highly encourage anyone who is even wondering about doing something like this to go for it.

After doing one marathon and several half marathons (13.1 miles), I‘m completely sold on the half.  It‘s not nearly as hard on the body and wayyyyy more fun. . . for me at least.

I had SUCH an amazing time on Sunday.  I rocked.  I rolled.  I ran some and walked some and laughed and played a lot.   I spent not one minute looking good or getting it right.  I felt completely free the entire time.

The whole things was a blast in a hundred countless ways.   However the real “Peak Moment” came for me at mile 12 when Kenny Loggins “Conviction of the Heart” came blasting onto my IPod.

Loggins wrote the song many years ago and yet I find the lyrics quite timely.  I‘ve posted them below.
For me, the lyrics are poetry and speak directly  to the essence of what we do as Co-Active coaches. ..support, empower, entice, encourage and call forth others to speak with CONVICTION of the Heart!

Where are the dreams that we once had?
This is the time to bring them back.
What were the promises caught
On the tips of our tongues?
Do we forget or forgive?
There’s a whole other life waiting to be lived when…
One day we’re brave enough
To talk with conviction of the heart.
And down your streets I’ve walked alone,
As if my feet were not my own
Such is the path I chose,
Doors I have opened and closed
I’m so tired of living this life,
Fooling myself, believing we’re right when…
I’ve never given love
With any conviction of the heart.
One with the Earth, with the sky
I believe we’ll survive
If we only try…
How long must we wait to change
This world bound in chains that we live in
To know what it is to forgive,
And to be forgiven?
It’s been too many years of talking now.
Isn’t it time to stop somehow?
Air that’s too angry to breathe
Water our children can’t drink
You’ve heard it hundreds of times
You say you’re aware, believe and you care, but…
Do you care enough
To talk with conviction of the heart?

Seven Practices

Here are seven. . . .let‘s call them practices. . . . .that I have been collecting.  I‘ve been trying to think of a snazzy name for them.  The 7 principles of Fulfillment.  Or the seven practices of happiness.  I‘m not great at naming things (witness In The Bones-:)

Anyway, here they are. .. .you can name them for yourself if you‘d like:
1.    People are more important than things.
When I married Henry in 1995 one of my marraige vows was a committment to building a home together where the people were more important than the things.
When we moved into our home in Dillon Beach, I used this as a central design theme. .. .that there would not be any place in the house where people would not feel easy and like they could put their feet up and relax.

I use this whenever I feel attached to a thing and when I get pulled to performing or looking good.   I have numerous opportunities to practice

2.    Trust your dreams. Doubt your doubts.

This is from the brilliant Henry Kimsey-House when he was leading the Dreamtimes Leadership Program.  It got printed on the back of the Dreamtimes t shirt and it was fun to travel with Henry when he was wearing.  The most unlikely people would comment, or give us a thumbs up or just smile and wave.

3.    Whenever possible, recover to gratitude.
Gratitude is the most healing thing I know.  It‘s impossible to be in a distortion of my self and in gratitude at the same time.
4.    Breathing is always a good idea.
We don‘t much. . . breathe that is.  I notice that whenever I check, I‘m holding my breath a little and other folks are as well.  If I‘m feeling less present than I would like, I practice the following little mantra:  “Where is my breathe, where are my feet?  where is my butt?”  Once I‘ve connected with these three things,  I‘m present and in the moment once again.
5.  Whatever happens is an opportunity to create.
This is from the Beauty Way, my spiritual practice which is based in ancient Mayan teachings and combines Appreciation (that energy mind consciousness that can see the perfected ness of what is and with gratitude responds) and Self Authorship (holding responsibility for creating one‘s life).

6.    Life is a dance. Work some and play some and move some and laugh some and cry some and love some. . .every day.

This is from one Robert Fulgum whom I love beyond reason.
7.    WHO you are while you are doing what you are doing is way more important than WHAT you are doing.
I made this one up.  It speaks to the importance of presence and being.  If find that if action is connected to presence in this way, that what I create and do has resonance and meaning.  If my action is not connected to that place of presence within myself, it doesn‘t MATTER what I do.  It will be brittle and not life giving and sustaining.

Weaving 2010

New beginnings have historically been quite a trap for me.  I have such a tendency to be drawn to those lines in the sand; a date or time frame in which I will make Big Changes.  These things almost never last and generally become a huge opportunity for lots of negative self talk and limiting beliefs.

I‘ve  come to realize is that, for the most part, Big Changes thatsustain don‘t flow out of a specific date or time frame. Lately I‘ve had the experience of weaving my life into a rich and colorful tapestry informed by a lively combination of my own intention and the often unexpected colors that arise in the day to day.

Left to my own devices, my weaving would be less expansive, lesscolorful and certainly less interesting. It goes sort of like this:I begin weaving away with my FAVORITE colors. . .let‘s say rich greens and golds and oranges and maybe a touch of dusty pink. (I‘m quite please with the pink and think I‘m being oh so inventive.)

Then life hands me turquoise. “Turquoise????” I exclaim. “Turquoise really doesn‘t FIT, you know. It certainly wasn‘t in the plan. I think it will look quite ugly. Besides, I don‘t know anything ABOUT turquoise and I‘m not sure that I can even work with it. ” You get the picture.

Then I remind myself that every one of life‘s colors is a huge gift and that I have a soul‘s agreement to embrace each one. I remind myself that there is a much larger plan for the tapestry of my life, one filled with magic and mystery and the unkown. And so I begin weaving away.

Sometimes I have no idea how it will come out. I remind myself to trust and to give my hands over to that which exists beyond the very limited scope of what I know. It‘s an adventure, this weaving. ..and very alive.

Some time later. .. .a day, a month, a year, I notice how the turquoise is just right. How it really pops out those original colors and how well it fits with the other surprising colors that have come my way in the meantime. I notice the interesting pattern that continues to emerge; beautiful and compelling, yet never fully defined. I feel gratitude and something that I can‘t quitedescribe. Fulfillment perhaps.

So, it‘s important that I show up. It matters that I weave decisively with intention and purpose and choice and all of that. At the same time and quite paradoxically, the magic truly flows when I surrender and give myself over to the mystery.

I‘d love to hear about how you weave your life.

Karen

King of the World!

Sexy Blue People!

It‘s a foggy morning here at Dillon Beach and I‘m feel very virtuous to be up so early.  Dawn is just starting to paint the fog a magical pink and as I look out over the ocean waves, I‘m feeling like The King of the World!  Or maybe the Queen.

Speaking of which, I saw the movie Avatar this past Sunday.  WOW!  What a way to kick of the new year.  Okay, the plot is a little thin and predictable and, to a quote a critique on Rotten Tomatoes “It is one of the most violent peacnik movies in recent memory”.

Still, what a magical world James Cameron and his vast team created for us!  Though at 2 hours 40 minutes  is fairly long, I found myself IN the movie for the duration.  I always love it when the world of a movie captures me completely.  When the credits begin to roll in Avatar, my internal response was “Nooooooo. . . .no, not yet.  I want to swim and fly in the magic of that world a little longer, please.”  I can only imagine what it might be like to see the thing on IMAX!

The other thing that inspires me about Avatar is the courage and vision of Cameron.  Evidently he began filming with the technology ALMOST there. . . .but not quite.  He and Peter Jackson were pushing the envelope through out filming. .. literally building the roads as they walked on them.  This kind of dedication and commitment is either awe inspiring or insane.  Probably both.

For me, Avatar captures the best of what movies are all about, transporting me to a fully developed time and place that is unlike any I have ever known.  And how in the world did they manage to make 6 feet blue people look so incredibly sexy?!!

kkh

Celebrating Failure

At CTI we make much of celebrating failure. This has been a controversial concept over the years. Here in Northern California many folks don‘t LIKE the word failure wanting to change it to something more “enlightened” sounding. . ..like “positive growth experience.”.

I find it useful to come directly at the word. â?¦failure, particularly because we seem to be so afraid of it. I wonder why. Do we really believe that “succeed” makes us right and good and “fail” makes us bad and wrong?

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