Leaders Have Wings

Miki Yoshino CPCC, a Co-Active Coach in Japan, shares her epiphany from the recent disaster in her country.

On March 11, when the biggest earthquake ever experienced in Japan struck the country, I was in Tokyo, two hundred miles southwest of the epicenter. I was on a subway, and suddenly I felt as if I were riding a runaway horse. The continuous, very strong aftershocks made me feel seasick. All trains stopped, so I had to walk six hours to my parents’ house.

Miki spreading her Leadership wings. Photo by Eiko Shimozono.

During those hours, I walked on the unstable ground with some new friends I met along the way. We exchanged important information to be safe, such as where the nearest evacuation center was located, and encouraged each other. We shared a fear of the possibility of literally losing the place where we belong. And we wished we were birds so we could forget all fears related to belonging. But we realized that we have wings called communication. Around midnight, I arrived at my parents’ house.

On March 12, there was an explosion at the Fukushima nuclear power plant. Every minute, distressing news broke my heart. I started asking for help from the Sea Lions, my Co-Active Leadership tribe, and from people living in other countries by using the Co-Active Network, email, Facebook, mailing lists, Skype, etc. I helped people that way, too. Yes, I intentionally used my wings.

I remembered Kevin Cashman’s words at the Global Co-Active Summit in February: “Transformation is now.” I decided to create something from this chaos even if I felt fierce pain and deep grief.

Some of the Sea Lions said to me, “My home is open.” It made some space inside of me. Some of them checked their countries’ mass media and shared important information about radiation. Some supported me by listening to me. And everyone I interacted with asked about specific needs from a loving and sincere place.

I began to think deeply about what is truly needed for Japan and the people who live here. And for that, I needed to think about us human beings and our big house, the Earth. I really felt honored to be a part of this global extended family and realized that I love sharing the Earth with all of you!

The disaster in Japan is pointing us in the direction of our transformation. We need to think about more than recovery: We all need to think about how to share the Earth, too. This issue is all of ours. If we follow our usual pattern, then in the coming months, we will again forget to open our hearts and transcend our egos. What we need is to keep remembering that for the Earth to be whole and for us humans to be whole, we need to embrace the beauty of our diversity.

So, I decided to hold a Global Conversation Circle and invited the Sea Lions and people on the Co-Active Network to join me in a teleconference on March 18. I wanted to facilitate a dialogue of deep listening, not a discussion of issues. Seven people, including me, gathered via Skype and talked about ourselves and the Earth. Two members of the Sea Lions in Brazil and Israel and other people I’ve never met from the U.K., U.S. and Japan shared their hearts and their thoughts. We were like skydivers in formation, there was so much connection and the space was filled with light. As we wrapped up, we affirmed each others’ promises for action and being.

The Global Conversation Circle is a kind of stone that holds open our individual doors to the world, from each of our belonging places. Our first call was a real place to remember that we are already a global extended family. And this, I felt, was my new place to belong. On unstable ground that is still shaking here in Japan, I can feel that I belong to this world.

Finally, I feel that I have found my quest. I still have strong, speechless pain. Honestly, I cried while writing this. I really hope that all people on Earth use this opportunity to shift their consciousness. This is my dream.

To join Miki’s next Global Conversation Circle via teleconference April 1, 14:00 (GMT), please check Miki’s GCC Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Global-Conversation-Circle/111794692232527.
Dial-in Number: 1-270-696-1555 (The U.S.)
Participant Access Code: 1480179
You may join in the third GCC via phone or Skype.

Everyone is a Leader

A pessimist, they say, sees a glass of water as being half-empty; an optimist sees the same glass as half-full. But a leader sees a glass of water and starts looking for someone who might be thirsty. –Communications Consultant, G. Donald Gale

Where does it come from, that urge within us to contribute, to serve?  We each have a destiny to fulfill. Everyone is needed. . .essential really. And yet somehow people get disconnected from any sense of purpose. How does that happen? That sense of self collapsing in upon itself until we believe that we don’t matter? In this place of not mattering we feel alone and unimportant. Or we struggle to prove how big we are by gathering lots of stuff. . .lots of things around us as if these things, this stuff will give us weight and importance.

Yet it is so easy to matter. Breathe and you have an impact. You are having an impact all the time. One doesn’t need to manufacture grandiose plans to make a difference. One only has to smile at a young child.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for dreams and for the passion to make them real. I’m in the business of empowering people to expand their ability to contribute to the world. And yet in all of our desire to make things better, it’s easy to miss the importance of the moment. At the toll booth this morning I had a little joke with toll collector. I don’t even remember what it was about. . .something silly and we laughed together and had a moment of connection. The person in the grocery store line teased me about all the broccoli I was buying. He implied that there would be a BLAST at my house tonight. I went to my car with a lighter step.

Or the lovely woman who waved me in to the line of traffic as I was coming out of the grocery store parking lot. She saw that I would be stuck there for a while and motioned me to come in front of her, arriving at her destination a whopping 5 seconds later than she would have otherwise.

For me, leadership is not a function of position or title. It’s not really about who is at the front at all. Leadership is a function of RELATIONSHIP, of our ability to connect. . .to point, yes, but more than that to SERVE. I was served today by many and as I received the gift, I served the giver as well.

That capacity to serve is not reserved for a special few. It lives inside us all. In some it shines quite brightly and in others the light is covered, dimmed by some collective knot of life’s experiences. At any given moment in time, the leader within us peeks out or bursts forth, washing the whole of our world with light.
KKH

Do you know where my piece is?

Editor’s Note: Today’s guest blog about the Co-active Summit is from Amy Logan, a brand new CTI staff member. I think you’ll find she fits into our community beautifully—and in more ways than one.

There was no mistaking what word it was. The “p” was clipped on the right, but the puzzle piece I had received at the Summit was most of the word “Leap”. My heart pounded. It was the first day of the Summit as well as my first day of work at CTI as Director of Public Relations. This seemed like a very good harbinger.

Taking this job, making a major move and leaving a long-term relationship simultaneously, I was making my own personal leap into the unknown. Beholding “Leap”, I became acutely aware that hiring me and expanding the sales and marketing department was a big leap for CTI in their new push to bring Co-Activity to the world to create global transformational change.

Photo by David Taylor-Klaus.

Reluctantly, I followed the throng of puzzle-piece-wielding coaches into the chaos and din of the cavernous ballroom to locate our groups who had the same number on the backs of their pieces. Clutching my beloved, l somehow found the right table (#6) on the first try, which was a bit of a let-down as I had to surrender “Leap” immediately to the smaller puzzle taking shape there. I stood back as a man’s happy face appeared under my piece in the puzzle. The context was unclear but, I thought, soon I will know what my baby’s purpose is. I helped carry our puzzle up to the stage to add to the larger puzzle and bumped into Karen Kimsey-House there. She hugged and welcomed me to CTI. The Summit had barely begun and I already knew this job was going to be very different from any other I’d had.

Back at my table, I watched the puzzle come to life. When I saw The Compass, The Ascent, The Leap – also the names of the Pathway break-out sessions at the Summit – and how they lead to Transformational Change, the next step in evolution, I beamed with pride for my “Leap” being such a pivotal part of the equation. From afar, amidst 500 other pieces, it was hard to believe I had held it in my hands just 20 minutes before and now it was part of something larger, something even more meaningful. Suddenly, my “Leap” became our “Leap”. I could let go now.

Though I wanted to be mature about this, I secretly longed to get “Leap” back at the end of the Summit when we each got a piece of the puzzle to take home. Alas, I got a piece from puzzle #16, a spot between the trees on the path up. I choose to see this as every piece, whether it seems humble or exalted, matters.

Still I think about “Leap” and wonder who received it at the end of the Summit. Did you fall in love with it too? What does it mean in your life? Where does “Leap” live now? What’s your piece you wrote on the back? If you have “Leap” or know who does, please let me know!

A Reminder of Some Things You Already Know

Editor’s Note: Today we have another story from a Co-active Summit participant. Now at the half-way point of Certification, Shannon Ratay is a CPCC-in-the-making. She’s taking her own advice and boldly asking for a house-sitting opportunity in the Bay Area through the end of the month until her new home is ready. Help anyone?

“I’m living the mystery!”

My story is unique and for all that I’ve been given I’m profoundly grateful. But this post isn’t about my long, winding tale.

This is about knowing what you want, holding it securely but loosely, spreading the word gracefully (yes, I mean out loud so others can hear you), and then setting it up for success. And in my case, add in a special connection. But in truth, you already know this, really you do, so please consider my words as a gentle reminder.

Me: “I’ve got the Co-active Summit dates blocked off on my calendar and I’m keeping it free.”

Other: “Really?”

Me: “Yup. So when you get the call at the last minute and there’s an extra ticket, or you need another pair of hands to help out or just someone to say, ‘yes, I’ll go,’ I’m your girl.”

Other: “Okay! (???)”

That was my response for months to the question of whether or not I was going to the Summit. Since I live near CTI Headquarters and am a bit of an assisting junkie, I had more than a few opportunities to answer it, to a variety of people.

For many reasons (all very good, I promise) I just didn’t have the money to attend the summit. But I knew I was meant to be there. So I prepared like I was going – postcard on the fridge and dates blocked off on the calendar. No clients, no plans and no commitments for the span of five days. And no, this is not normally how I operate.

And then it happened – the call came.

It was less than two weeks before the start of the Summit when a special someone—my angel named Cricket Wingfield (Do you know her? Don’t you want to? Isn’t she amazing??)—realized she couldn’t go. In what only can be described as extreme generosity and a wild recognition of abundance, Cricket decided to gift the ticket to a person who really wanted to go. A wonderful someone I’ve never met, coupled with a few magic-makers at CTI, created a connection that goes beyond my capacity with words.

In truth, Cricket strengthened an invisible connection that already existed. As I learned at the Summit, she strengthened the connection of Co-activity – the common language that we speak and which binds us together. Through her, I learned the impact of recognizing abundance and sharing with others. She allowed me to fully jump into, experience and live the mystery. She demonstrated one of the many beautiful facets of this remarkable community.

I set out to share a reminder of things you already know, but the budding coach in me is compelled to leave you with these questions – and the possibility of changing a life, perhaps your own?

Where do have enough that you can give some away?

What do you want that you haven’t asked for – out loud?

An Open Letter to the First Co-active Summit

Editor’s Note: For two weeks the Transforum will feature personal experiences from participants in the Co-active Summit. Michael K. Spayd, Managing Director of Collective Edge Coaching, wrote the following declaration for his personal blog as a way to put a finishing touch on his personal experience. Due to popular response to his words, Michael then set up a Facebook page “Co-Active Summit Attendee Promises” to give people a place to register their own thoughts on the topic.

I regret that I did not say it then. But I was not ready, we were not ready. In the intervening hours, I have talked to some of you—bemoaned that we did not collectively ‘get to closure’—and I promised to do something. Here is a first thing.

This is one man’s proclamation for our summit, our summit communique. I hope YOU will consider whether you could align yourself with this statement, for the good of our mother Earth and our human family. Change it as you need to make it true for you. Then, please pass it on.

The 400 leaders and coaches of the first Co-active Summit in Marco Island, Florida, representing 22 countries throughout the world, make known the following Promise to our Co-Active colleagues, to friends and loved ones, to our communities and to the people of the world:

We believe the human community is at the critical time to change the dream of the world, a dream we have created together, a dream that leads to the destruction of the planet through overconsumption, the wasting of our human environment through social injustice, and the loss of spiritual fulfillment through disconnection and fear.

We believe that by uniting together, We can make the critical difference. We are committing ourselves to changing the dream to one that envisions a sustainable environment, spiritual fulfillment, and social justice for all people and beings. We hold that by taking this stand, our decision can provide the tipping point that the world needs now.

Each in our own way, we will help change the dream: in our selves, in our families, with our children, in front of our friends, inspiring our communities. Because we are leaders, we are coaches, we are human activists. Our weapon is love.

We have less than four years to take decisive action. To change our own life, to change our world, to change our collective dream, to alter the Earth’s destiny.  For the sake of our humanness, for the sake of our grandchildren’s grandchildren. In the words of Henry Kimsey-House, we must act from the paradox of Love AND Power, Feminine AND Masculine energies, Co AND Active. We can’t pick sides any more, coming from one OR the other. We must act from both.

One action we can all take right now, together, is to align with over 6,000 others who have taken the pledge at http://www.fouryearsgo.org/commit/

Because if not us, then who will? And if not now, then when, exactly?

We are the ones we have been waiting for. The time is now.

Four years…

Go!

Wake up! We’ve got a job to do!

Editor’s Note: For two weeks the Transforum will be filled with personal experiences from participants in the Co-active Summit. Up first is Emma LeFevre, a CPCC from Somerset UK who came to coaching after a career in teaching and is committed to playing full out.

There is a story to be told. And its so big and so vast I don’t know where to begin! So just begin. On Saturday morning I went out to my balcony to take in the beautiful view of the beach and sea and palm trees, and to stir my body into action for the last day of the First Global Co-active Summit in Florida. Then, suddenly a crow landed on my balcony and started speaking to me. This was very powerful because I am very fond of animal medicine! The crow spoke to me and then it turned round 360 degrees and spoke to the world.

This artwork “Roundtable Discussion – Crows” was created by painter Marion Rose.

I was still brimming with excitement about the crow when I saw Henry Kimsey-House. I told him what I’d seen. He asked “well, what did he say?” And because the little girl inside thinks that ‘Daddy’ has the answer, someone else is the expert, someone else knows better than me… I asked if he could help me. “No” came the reply. The crow that came and landed on my balcony not one metre from me and spoke to me said “Wake up.” ”Wake up.” Henry said “that’s pretty cool, that a crow came and said wake up to someone who is already awake.”

The message of the first morning at the Summit was that we as a co-active community of 35,000 trained coaches and leaders, have a job to do. Humanity has a job to do. And the process they designed was a navigation of this journey. Each one of us human beings is a piece of a puzzle, we have our own part to play, we are all part of the whole. Without every piece the puzzle is not whole. The amazing thing about a process like this is that everyone will get what they need, and everyone’s learning will be different. This is my journey as I navigated the Summit!

We started with Compass: Where are you now? How do you view the other? What is the shadow that governs you? For me I had a haunting realization that I was judge and critic, with a strong intolerance of victim. And from that I realized that I had a fear of embracing the victim within me. I also have an intolerance of those who dominate, and yet there is a huge part of me that wants to control. If when we pause and look at that unpleasant energy that sits within it is really very uncomfortable. There is a huge state of chaos within me that I am creating in the world outside. I am also the we. What would it really take to love the other? What would it take to love the other within?

The following day we took The Ascent: the long uphill climb to reach the Summit. I woke up in fear because I had chosen to challenge myself to a physical embodiment of the process. We were going to do a workshop: Coaching That Moves You. I had seen the preview video and I wasn’t convinced my body would hold out…  Fear, is the thing that holds me back, fear that I am not enough, fear that I will die, fear sits at the pit of my stomach around my heart and solar plexus. With high blood pressure, and a string of ancestors who have died from brain haemorrhages or strokes, it is a valid fear… And yet whilst I live in fear, I am only getting half way there. What would it take for me to feel the fear and work through it… what is on the other side of fear? We had been working really hard in this spinning session, and I was on the brink of saying enough is enough… and then the Instructor said that we were half way there. I felt sick inside… he asked the group is this where you usually quit? Half way? Yes I thought… I don’t usually even get halfway!! So I drove my body on and as I did I experienced this incredible opening… my heart opened through the fear. Tears of humbleness, of awe, of love for myself, just kept flowing down my face. The other side of my fear was space.

The final pathway was The Leap. We must do the work on the inside, to heal the me. But there is a bigger picture of the world. A world that is currently on a trajectory that is unsustainable. So in the afternoon we looked at the voice of the Elder. What is the voice within that transcends the chaos, what is the voice of wisdom? And when you find that voice, how do you hold a space for all the other voices in our world to be listened to? As an observer of the angry views that were coming out about issues facing our world in this workshop I wanted to leave, I was judge and jury, and very, very uncomfortable with the mess that was created. All those angry voices, weren’t we supposed to be looking for the Elder? And yet the leaders of this workshop held a space where all the voices could be heard. Can you imagine a world where we started to listen to each other? What would emerge from the chaos if we did?

As is often the case, the real work that happens, happens in the time in between. My friend came out from this session, overwhelmed with love for all the people there. I came out in my observant role, judge and critic. We went for a long walk along the beach. I felt resentful that he could feel love and I felt horrible. What did I need to let go of? All this bitterness inside… Aren’t I doing what I should be? Why is it so hard for me to feel love? We got half way on the walk and took a break, and climbed some rocks. I looked out to sea and there just in front of me were two dolphins… they were playing and leaping! Suddenly I felt that I was HELD. I was held in this huge container of love that is big enough to hold everything. It can even hold my shit!

This is such a simplification of the story of the pathways… and perhaps the most important bit is yet to be told. As a community, we have made a commitment to take a stand. However, this story doesn’t end there because yesterday on my balcony when I was preparing to leave, three crows came and spoke to me. I looked at them astonished. First one, then three? Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!

We Have a Job to Do

Editor’s note: The opening speech by Karen and Henry Kimsey-House at the Co-active Summit centered around the statement that ‘we have a job to do.’ Below are back and forth “riffs”—as Henry calls them—that formed the core of Karen and Henry’s call-to-action to the Co-active community.

Photo by Okokon Udo.

We have a job to do:

HKH
…and it’s about transformation. We can no longer stand by and hope that people become more conscious and evolve. We have to evoke transformation. We have to see the butterfly in every caterpillar. The nature of life is to transform and evolve and this is a messy, chaotic and often confusing process.

KKH
…and it’s about believing. Believing in the capacity of the human spirit to transcend the mess and navigate through the chaos into the next transformation.

HKH
…and it’s about evolving human consciousness. We humans are in the midst of an evolutionary leap and the foot is coming down on the other side of that leap and we have a job to do and it’s to be ready for what’s next. We need to be ready in ourselves and we need to be ready as coaches and leaders to guide, cajole, teach, coach, lead, and point the way to our fellow humans who are landing on the other side with us. We have to be flexible and clear as we step into this mystery, this new paradigm of existence. We need to be ready to both open up our own consciousness and to work with others to open up theirs.

KKH
…and it’s about participation, about helping people understand that the unfolding story of our world is co-created and we each have a part to play. We matter. We don’t need to have the answers. We need to know that together, we can find the way and together we can create possibilities that are not available when we stand alone. Our job is to engage fully 100%, to nourish and affirm life in each and every moment. We have to dance with our whole hearts in THIS moment and the next and the next.

Photo by Okokon Udo.

We have a job to do:

HKH
It is right behind the eyes of the person sitting next to you or the checker at the grocery store or the waitress at your table or the CEO of the company next door and that’s to make sure the lights are on and somebody is home. We have to find the dimmer switches in our fellow humans and support them in turning their lights on. We need to find the sparkle of aliveness in all of the eyes around us and use the gifts that we have developed in ourselves to brightening the consciousness of all of our species.

KKH
It’s about supporting people in breaking free from convention, from business as usual, from The Way It Is. We must help people find the courage and heart to stand firmly for what is real and true and be bold enough to live from the inside out rather than the outside in. Work is sacred. Work has to become a place where we come together to create something meaningful rather than a place where we put our authentic self in the closet just to survive. Our work places must become opportunities to engage, to fully express and share our creativity and our talents. We must work to help businesses understand that people truly are their greatest resource and that whatever we do, we do in relationship with each other.

HKH
It’s about passion, purpose and paradox. We have to courageously insist on people leading passion filled lives on purpose—while at the same time allowing people to find their own way to these lives. We have to live in the paradox of push and pull, stay and go, be and do, co and active. We have stand firmly for life affirming purpose and action and not allow ourselves to be stopped or stalled by life-diminishing beliefs or attitudes.

KKH
It is about preparing the ground for our future. We must teach others how to listen deeply, not to the words but to the message, the cry, the yearning, underneath. We need to ensure that education means more than memorization, We need to ensure that success is measured by what one has contributed to the world rather than by what one has taken away. And we need to ensure that dialog and disagreement are INVITED, CELEBRATED, EMBRACED in a way that brings us together as opposed to dividing us.

Photo by Okokon Udo.

HKH
We have a job to do in spreading the wonderful paradox of the Co-Active way. The way of “Co”, relationship, connection, intimacy, love, and the divine feminine expressed in its fullness and totality while at the same time expressing “Active” which is all about strength, power, action, making things real and the divine masculine. We can’t pick sides. We have a job to do to heal the “Co” and the “Active” in each and every one of us and to find the love and power in all of us and to be able to express and operate from both at 100% simultaneously.

KKH
We have a job to do and it’s about creating a world that works for everyone. We belong to each other and we live together in this home we call Earth. We must learn to honor our individuality and celebrate our shared human experience while at the same time affirming in each moment that we are one with all of life.

Homeward Bound

Today is a travel day. I’m heading home from the first global Co-Active Summit. At present I’m curled into my airplane seat somewhere over the great Midwest of the United States. All is quiet save the consistent thrum of the engines.

Karen and Henry Kimsey-House sharing the Love in a general session. Photo by Johan Premfors.

It feels strange. . .the quiet. After the sound and power of the past 3 days, it feels odd and a little lonely. All across the globe people are making the same journey. . .making their way home and navigating that interesting transition back into real time and the day to day.

In my mind’s eye, I carry snapshots of people and events that nourish and inspire me. These images of moments frozen in time capture the deeper heart, the essence of any experience. I love to run the fingers of my mind slowly over these memories as one would run a hand over a piece of exquisitely carved furniture, appreciating the beauty and the satisfying feel of the smooth, polished wood.

I carry so many of these images from the Summit. Representatives from 22 (yes, that’s right TWENTY TWO) different countries. Countless people hugging me, thanking me and telling me how CTI changed their life. Kevin Cashman deep in conversation with a group of people from four different continents, two translating the conversation into their own language so that others could understand. Lynne Twist on the dance floor leading us all in the Hustle. People coming out of different pathways laughing, arguing, engaged, and in the case of “Coaching that Moves You”, SWEATY and glowing.

In our opening general session the gentle gurgles of Ellory, who at 8 months, was our youngest attendee. The dignity and proud grace of Margo House (Henry’s mother) who, at 83, was our eldest. Sabrina and her guitar singing us sweetly home. Henry’s face shining at the end of the Akashic Reading on Co-Active’s place in the world. Kevin Cashman telling us that we “have a core competency in Love”. Lynne Twist, galvanizing us all into action with 4YearsGo. www.fouryearsgo.org.

All these memories and so many more will nourish me in the days and years to come.

In the end however, it was the Love that blew me away. We were washed with Love. It carried us, nourished us, pointed us, and transformed us. I saw it bouncing out of the faces of people. I felt it bursting in my own heart. It filled the hotel and spilled over to the ocean where the waves carried and spread all that love far and wide. Love. Such a simple thing really. So natural, to love one another. When we choose it, so easy.

As the Summit came to a close, many people asked me how I was feeling. “Wow, you must be delighted. Excited. Proud.” Yes, of course. . .all that and more than I can find the words to say. Mostly though, I felt gratitude. Immense gratitude for the privilege of serving this work, for the people who have come to be a part of it and will come in the years ahead. Huge gratitude for all of you who came to Marco Island to help create magic and to all of you who sent your love and intention to this time.

I love the phrase from Systems work. . .“myth change”. This is when the story of a person, a couple of a group changes completely. This Global Co-active Summit was a myth change for Co-active in the world. However you choose to express it, you are a part of that unfolding story and you matter.

The reverberations of the Co-active Summit continue. Many emails and blog postings. A Facebook page was sent up by a participant to capture the commitment of Summit attendees: http://tinyurl.com/5wjncaf.

There will be more to come. Much more. For now, it is enough to know that we stand shoulder to shoulder in our commitment to creating a new dream for our world.
Much love,
KKH